Help! Help!

I'm really starting to fall in love with you.

10/12/08 To Date...

These past few days have been the most amazing.

I work till I ache my bones

YOU CALLED! YOU CALLED!

I can't stop blushing and shaking!

Urgent Calls

The moment she told me the good news, my knees began to shake.

Early December

The best nights spent are the ones where your Vodka tastes like water, your voice sounds so smooth and the guitar makes you forget about all your problems.

Poo Glue

Vacations were never really a good thing; You learn what you really missed.

Sidewalk He walks.

I have so many things to say to you...

But I just can't find the right words.

Well here it goes...

24hours till flight.

I'm so excited, but scared to do this.

I've never taken a random trip before,

Alone...

13 Long Hours

This feeling is giving me the shakes.

I don't want to let myself fall into you.

I'm so scared, I want to block you out.

But part of me won't let that happen.

I have to much hope.

Polar Ice Guy

I have this crush, on this guy.

He doesn't know it...

But everytime I see him, my heart beats faster.

I hope his smile doesn't lie.

This is so horribly highschool.

Tiny little spots.

Everyday I hate you that little bit more. Zeke understands.

I miss you so much.

Now Highways turn to tidal waves;
They're asking me to export all your insecurities.
But that wind that blows across your room
It's going to set the sails;
And send me back to you.
Please.

Halloween.

I've done some pretty stupid shit, but apparently nothing compare to you.

A week and Two days

Home is so close. I can't wait. I miss you all so much.

In a newyork minute...

baby I've changed, please come back

Magnetic Words

did we entwine to escape?

Already Counting...

I love this month. I love its fall weather. I love Halloween. This is better then Christmas. I also love little pigs in pumpkins.

C & R

I had a dream last night that we loved eachother enough to have relations. All sorts of relations. I would have never thought of you like that before, because of her. Silly me, then there was you, who I also had relations with. We were so loving. Yet you also have a better half. I guess I'll always want what I can't have.

Who's going to...

Darling, I do believe we've lost eachother.

I hate Starbucks but...

Pumpkin Spiced Latte's are my love.

Greatest Time of the Year♥

HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL!!!!

Facebook: Good or Bad?

The other day I was being a FB snoop, and found out a guy I used to adore had a girlfriend. This crushed me. I'm not really sure why, because we never kept in touch after it went downhill.

But then tonight, one of his friends mentioned to me that he was dating. I pretended I didn't care and played it off really cool.

Which brings me to think, if we're all snooping on Facebook are we setting ourselves up for heartbreaks, or are we really getting a head start on those awkward questions we usually take another drink over.

How Strange?

Last nigh I drempt...

That you picked me a sunflower from a garden.
You picked it so deep, it had the root attached.

And we tried to get playful in the middle of a street.
We layed down there and you licked my shoe while
an Officer pulled up and told us to break it up.

Then at some point during this dream,
I was locked in a colorful room, the floor a shallow pool.
And I was looking for a peircing bead, for my industrial.

Then finally we were on a couch outside of a little gas station in my home town.
We had sexual relations, atleast I was told we were having them.
And when we finished, I gagged and threw up the contents of my mouth.
Oddly, I don't even want to write what those contents were...

You coulda been anyone else

Why do I always let myself get hurt,
Over something I wish was real?

Lucky Number 8

For Once In Our Lives, It felt Perfect between us.

look how pretty she is, when she falls down.

I don't understand you, or you and I don't trust you.

I don't understand you because you always know when I've messed up.
And you always know when to step in, and put in two cents.

And I don't understand you because you're so fake.
You lie, you're not real, you're just a shell of something.

And I don't trust you because you're far to close.
You say a few things that freak me out.
And I may like it?

Mon Jul 28, 2008 11:39 pm

Tonight, I'm not sure if I should cry.
I mean, is it really worth crying over spilt milk.
I've drank a bottle of wine and
smoked half a pack of cigarettes because of you.
I don't know how
to make things right, okay?
I tried my best.
I wanted to be your friend.
I didn't want you out of my life.
But you said goodbye.
And then I said goodbye,
and you erased me from your life.
As if nothing happened.
And now I'm holding back tears,
and they'll soon be running down my face.
It hurts more to hold them back
but I keep thinking if I don't cry them
that I'll be strong.
That I shouldn't cry
because I don't even know if you're worth it.
But if I do cry, I think you've won,
and that I've made one of the
biggest mistakes of my life.
Maybe I did love you.
Maybe right now i wasn't ready
and maybe one day I will be.
Or maybe I'll just stay this mess
you erased forever.
I just wish it didn't end tonight.
Not like this.

Young Girl.Just Hold Tight.

Maybe I never attempted Suicide
Because I was to busy stopping you.
And just look where that got us...

I'm Sorry...But

Your comments made me want to vomit. I'm so fucking disgusted by your conclusions.

And that makes 4...

Can someone please tell me why having children is such a fucking growing fad.
Is it that hard to keep yourself protected these days?
Really is it?!

Hmm...

So, I just walked out on dinner with my parents
I don't feel half bad

RadioForHelp - Don't Flatter Yourself

i know that you deserve better
what did i do
to deserve this?
i'm sorry, i'm sorry
you know that i'm sorry
this time your eyes caught me off guard
and you've only got one shot to make things alright
so let's get this over with...

just one last time
tell me that you're coming home
oh, i know that you're not coming home tonight
(tonight) i want you here
(i want you here) i want you to know that i'm not alright

it seems like you've been gone forever
but forever not long enough to me
"i'm sorry"
"don't say say sorry, for what?"
don't flatter yourself
i know you're beautiful but there's so much more, my miss

just one last time
tell me that you're coming home
oh, i know that you're not coming home tonight
(tonight) i want you here
(i want you here) i want you to know that i'm not alright

i wish we could just get over this
but i just dont know how to make you see
"i'm sorry
"but are we really?
no.
we've been here before
i know you're still upset but i just want to make this right

just one last time
tell me that you're coming home
oh, i know that you're not coming home tonight
(tonight) i want you here
(i want you here) i want you to know that i'm not alright

how do i get it through to you
when it always seems like we're on different pages
of the same wonderful book?
don't know where to start this,
all i want is for this to end and for you
to be here beside me
this constant thinking about it is driving me insane
sometimes i think that i am like your worst enemy
i might know
that i
will get over you...

EyesWideShut

When she said, "I didn't know relationships were supposed to be this fun." I cried. I cried so much because I didn't understand how I could have missed that concept, it's so simple. So simple that it brings me to tears thinking about it. How did I miss that, How?

iohsjdgfhsk

Fuck being home sick.
Fuck crying all these tears.
Fuck trying to be someone you're not.

91m 18s

Show me your Porn Star Face. Ya thats the one, Like Tom DeLong....riiight... Ha, The things mommy and daddy do.

Don't let me down

This is not how I want to feel. This is how we should not act.
This makes it so much harder to end the fight.
I've never wanted to lose so badly.

Don't carry the world upon your shoulders.
Well don't you know that its a fool who plays it cool.
By making his world a little colder

She forgets.

I feel lost.
I'm not myself.
Excuse me, My hair straightener is on.

Mr.Wrong

Why did I read it again.
Gosh, this makes me sick.

Foreshadow, For Shame

I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you.
I'm going to break your heart.

I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you.
Please don't be mad.

I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you,
I'm going to hurt you.
I really hate myself.

For the things I do to you.

Oh Fruit Loops!

You really friggen suck.

what kind of word is figures?

Figures,

The one that feels the worst: Looks the best

You make me feel...

"I realized I loved you when you said you'd take the LRT to see me"

At the cemetery gates, In the dress your husband hates.

I'm not a brilliant writter, I know that. You're not a perfect love.
It just breaks my heart that the things that matter most are unreliable.
Our concept of the perfect world is a mess, during life.

Today, I noticed that maybe we should stop talking and just listen.
Listen to our bodies, to our hearts, to the world around us.

I saw the most heart breaking things today.
I was walking through the cemetery to think. It was calm, I was calm.
It was just me and the silence of the world around.
It was like having new breath into your body.
Among me, fallen soilders, fathers, mothers, lovers, family and children.
Children being put in the ground broke me from my thoughts.
It was hard to imagin just the thought of what it would be like to do this.

I have no words for my feeling...it was one of the worst I've felt.
I walked away and took another trail, following a car this time up a path.The Car stopped.
I stopped.
An older lady got out of the car, she saw me. I saw her.
We both had that same look on our faces as she turned away and began walking across the ground.
I felt rude to watch,but I couldn't look away.

I watched her say a prayer for the site infront of her. Her heart still feeling love for the one below.
I cried.I cried a lot.
I felt for the woman infront of me.
I felt a release being here in this moment and time seeing this.

I feel as if I needed this afternoon realization about the world, how it can defeat you and put you away. But you can overcome it.
Someone will always love you.Someone will always be there.
Don't give up Zosia. You can do this.
Its not over yet.
"...And then she said she can't believe, genius only comes along in storms of
fabled foreign tongues tripping eyes, and flooded lungs. Northern downpour sends its love"

Fuck Foreplay!

A message from a boy:
-via text-

I would thrust your box off.

Brilliant? Ha.

Dizzy

I'm so fucking worried.

What a view!

YA! $250.00 Later, and we await the acceptance to our new place. Please let this happen..PLEASE!

Unbalanced.

I don't get it.
Case #1
You're depressed and don't want to talk about it.
You run from your problems.
You won't let me help.
This feels out of my nature.

Case #2
You're happy. You miss me. You made me feel amazing.

I'm unbalanced because this is backwards from what it should be.


WTF, MATE?!

Does this look infected..

Thaaaats right, days ago I took out four peices of me that we're extra pressure in my life I didn't need! Now if only all problems were this easy to cure!
I think I'm going to make a necklace...

Going Going Gone...

YAY! I can hardly wait to spend time at home with my family for a whole week!
Ya Hinton! I kinda heart you!

Nervous Business

...You Don't Even Wanna Know...

This is how you smile, when you're heartless

Take One: The Heartless Pair, Joel and Zosia
(Inbetween conversation)
Joel: Sup Heartless Girl
Zosia: Sup Heartless Boy, betcha I'll make you smile
Joel:Betcha won't. I don't smile
Take Two:*Zosia makes faces, Joel smiles*
Zosia: I win, you have a heart.

Something Corporate

FUCK.

(I don't know what I want.)

p.s. My heart hurts again.

p.p.s This song reminds me of us, I hate it.

p.p.p.s. I love the band though.

To those who may not know the song...

I can't imagine all the people that you know

and the places that you go

When the lights are turned down low

and I don't understand all the things you've seen

but I'm slipping in between

You and your big dreams

It's always you

In my big dreams

And you tell me that its over

wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clovers

and your restless

and im naked

you gotta get out

you cant stand to see me shakin

no

could u let me go?

i didnt think so

and you dont wanna be here in the future

so you say the presants just a pleasant interuption to the past

and you dont wanna look much closer

cause ur afriad to find out all this hope

you had sent into the sky by now had

crashed

and it did

because of me

and then you bring me home

afraid to find out that your alone oh

and im sleeping in your living room

but we dont have much room to live

and i had these dreams in them i learned to play guitar

maybe cross the country

become a rock star

and there was hope in me that I could take you there

but damnit you're so young

well i dont think i care

and if i hurt you

then im sorry please dont think that this was easy

and then you bring me home

cause we both know what its like to be alone oh

and im dreaming in your living room

but we dont have much room to live

and konstantine is walking down the stairs

doesnt she look good

standing in her underware

and i was thinking

what i was thinkin

we've been drinkin and it doesnt get me anywhere

my konstantine came walking down the stairs

and all that i could do was touch her long blond hair

and ive been thinkin

but it hurts me thinking

that these nights when we were drinking

no they never got us anywhere

no

this is because i can spell confusion with a 'K'

and i can like it

its to dying in anothers arms

and why i had to try it

its to jimmy eat world

and those nights in my car

when the first star you see

may not be a star

im not your star

isnt that what you said

what you thought this song meant

and if this is what it takes

just to lye with my mistakes

and live with what i did to you

all the hell i put you through

i always catch the clock

its 11:11

now you wanna talk

its not hard to dream

you'll always be my konstantine

my konstantine

they'll never hurt you like i do

no they'll never hurt you like i do

no,no,no, no, no, no, no, no

this is to a girl

who got into my head

with all the pretty things she did

hey

ya know

you keep me up in bed

this is to a girl

who got into my head

with all these fucked up things i did

hey

maybe

baby you could keep me up in bed

my konstanine

you spin around me like a dream

we played out on this movie screen

and i said

did u know i missed you

i miss you

and then you bring me home

and we go to sleep

but this time not alone

and i know

and you'll kiss me in your living room

i know i know

you miss me in your living room

cuz these nights i think

maybe that i miss you in my living room

but we dont have much room

i said does anybody need that room

because we all need a little more room

to live

my konstantine...

Heh Creep.

Being Bored was never so much fun.
Heart Heart Heart

1408

It's 1:30am on March 12th 2008. . . Did it really take you 4 months to take attraction to me??

You are so not worth the $15.00 I spent on a late fee at BlockBuster.